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Coffee Talk

Our honest answers to some of the most hotly debated topics.
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There are some questions—Is it pronounced car-uh-mel or care-uh-mel?—that seem benign at the surface, but elicit strong enough opinions that they've waged internet wars and ended friendships. Below we answered some of our favorite "controversial" questions—let us know if you agree in the comments! (Oh, and by the way, it's care-uh-mel). 

1. Top sheet or no top sheet?

Emily: Top sheet (even though I often get twisted up inside of ours since I'm such an "active" sleeper).

Geoffrey: Not using a top sheet is like going commando. It's fine every once in a while, but you don't want to live your life that way.

Alina: My answer is so unequivocally "top sheet" that I didn't even know a world existed in which this was a thing people debated. I really didn't. 

Leslie: No top sheet—duvet all the way.

2. What is the meaning of this emoji to you 🙆?

Emily: Oh heeeeey!

Geoffrey: I've never used or considered that emoji, but for sake of answering the question, it looks like she's doing yoga.

Alina: Hay girl! 

Leslie: Ballerina. No question.

3. Having a wedding on a holiday weekend: Rude or convenient?

Emily: If it's local, I suppose that's convenient, but since it's typically more expensive to travel over holiday weekends, I'd say rude.

Geoffrey: Depends on the people and how close I am to them. Good friends/family, I wouldn't mind. 

Alina: Rude. Don't co-opt everyone's holiday. 

Leslie: Convenient, I think? TBH I've only attended two weddings (one as the flower girl) so I don't really know what I'm talking about.

4. Wait for the guy (or girl) to say “I love you” or no? 

Emily: I've had both scenarios play out and while I'm fine saying it first, I much prefer when a guy does (I'm happy to report that G offered it up two weeks into dating).

Geoffrey: n/a

Alina: Ugh, I WANT the guy to say it first, but have said it first in every. single. relationship I've ever been in. The love just pours out of me. 

Leslie: I don't think it matters either way! Who says guys can't be swept off their feet?

5. Ketchup on a hotdog?

Emily: I believe that the more condiments on a hot dog, the better. But of course since G finds it so offensive when I put ketchup on mine, I try to be secretive about it and hide it under everything else. Because I have so many positive associations with ketchup (hash browns, fries, burgers), I feel like I'm doing myself a disservice by not using it.

Geoffrey: Not going to lie, if you put ketchup on a hot dog I think you're insane and clearly have no understanding of the proper use of condiments. For clarity, the only acceptable toppings for hot dogs are: mustard, onions, relish, sauerkraut, and sometimes chili. (If you're in Chicago, you can add a tomato and pickles.)

Alina: One thousand percent yes. 

Leslie: Yes! And literally everything else you can fit between a bun—relish, onion, mustard, fried onion... 

6. Stay friends with an ex or no?

Emily: Though I'm not having any of my exes over for weekly dinners, I've certainly maintained friendships with old boyfriends.

Geoffrey: I never have, even when the breakup has been on friendly terms. I've simply don't make an effort to maintain a connection once things have ended.

Alina: For sure. 

Leslie: I said "yes" to this question for years—why wouldn't you want to stay in contact with someone you cared about at one point?—but in my wise old age, I've realized it's cleaner and much healthier to end things cold turkey (yes, including stalking him and his new girlfriend on Facebook). You'll miss him or her for a while, but you'll be better off in the long run. 

7. Take the Christmas decorations down the on the 26th or keep them up through first week of January?

Emily: I typically like to move on from holiday decorations as soon as possible (I detest seeing anything Halloween-related once we've entered November), but I make an exception when it comes to Christmas. Those cozy, lazy days following the holiday are so lovely and made all the more special when cuddled up near the tree.

Geoffrey: We're a little lazy with our decorations, but taking them down on January 1 is our deadline.

Alina: Keep 'em up until Jan 1. Then a new year has started and it's time to move on. 

Leslie: Take them down! Don't be sad that it's over, be happy that it happened—but also don't drag it into mid-January.

8. Wedding party or no party?

Emily: Nope! Certainly have your friends be involved, but let them enjoy your wedding day without any of the stress and obligation that comes with bridesmaid duty.

Geoffrey: No party.

Alina: Wedding party. 

Leslie: I think it's whatever the bride prefers, but I do think "Maids of Honor" are a little weird unless you have one sister—publicly announcing your favorite friend is bound to hurt someone's feelings, even if you don't mean to.

9. Would you let your latte sit out all day and still take a sip from it?

Emily: Yuuuup. Plus I kind of lean into the idea of having two coffee drinks throughout the day - one that's hot in the morning and then one that's cold (I'll occasionally even add ice) later on.

Geoffrey: This question is grossing me out. Drink your latte in a reasonable amount of time and if you want another, get one. Leaving a tepid cup of milk sitting at your desk all day is awful.

Alina: I do this every single day of my life. I've gone like 16 hours. I'm abhorrent. 

Leslie: Definitely. But I'm about as far from a food safety expert as it gets, so don't listen to me.

10. How often should you wash your jeans?

Emily: I used to be able to stretch how often I'd wash my jeans much longer before having Sloan (no matter what, her little hands are always dirty and her preference is to wipe them on my legs). So I'd say usually after two or three wears. 

Geoffrey: Maybe once or twice a year. I wear a lot of selvedge denim and they take time to break in. Yes, this is gross, but whatever. However, if I spill something on them, I will wash them right away.

Alina: I pretty much throw them in the hamper after one wear. 

Leslie: If I say, "When I spill something on them?" will I come off as gross? 

11. Is it ever okay to put ice in wine?

Emily: Nah. They actually brought extra glasses of ice to our table when we ordered wine in Paris, which I found so odd. Though I like my beverages to be very cold, I'm not big into diluting alcohol.

Geoffrey: Unless it's a wine cooler, no.

Alina: You better believe it is. 

Leslie: If it's a hot evening and you forgot to put the wine in the fridge to chill, ice happens.

12. Food in bed?

Emily: I constantly am trying to convince G that I can eat in bed without getting crumbs everywhere (though it's yet to happen). Since I grew up in a house where we didn't have TVs in the bedroom nor were allowed to eat away from the table, it always seems like such a luxury to be able to do those things in bed. I mean, I think there are limits, of course (like a full-blown fish dinner would totally be inappropriate), but if you have a little ice cream or some cookies or something, that's fine.

Geoffrey: The bed is for sleeping and other recreations, but it's not the dinner table. Unless you're sick and need to stay in bed, keep your food out.

Alina: Always. Who cares. Brush the crumbs out if they get in. Life goes on. It's not permanent. Unless you spill, but just don't spill.
Leslie: Watching a movie in bed while eating cookies and milk is one of life's greatest joys.

13. Would you date a guy (or girl) your height or shorter?

Emily: No. I think the shortest guy I ever dated was 5'10 and I felt self conscious any time I wore heels around him (I'm almost 5'7). Height is a big thing for me and I love that even in my tallest sandals, G's still taller than me.


Alina: My answer to this for yeeaaarrrrrrsssssssss was that I would never. I really didn't think I would. We don't need this to get into an argument of superficiality: we all have things that are turn-ons and turn-offs, deal breakers, etc., and I just like taller guys. But then I surprised myself by going and dating a guy who was my height. I was like, "oh, I guess this is something that's not a hard no for me, because here I am, doing it." 

Leslie: Definitely! The only thing that matters is the connection, regardless of appearance. If we judge guys for their height, how are we supposed to expect them to us to find us beautiful when we're in sweat pants, hair tied, chillin' with no make-up on?

14. Man pedicures? (not getting toes painted a color, just going to the nail salon and getting a polish-less treatment). 

Emily: Totally, especially to prevent any 'Dumb and Dumber' situations. 

Geoffrey: Sure.

Alina: Haha, YES. This was my question. Back in college, I was more close-minded. A friend's boyfriend would get pedicures with her and I thought it was weird. Years later and after moving to L.A. (where dudes get pedicures all the time) I'm so down with a MAN-icure (get it). I'd go get one in tandem with my boyfriend. It's great. There's no gender rule that a man can't get his feet soaked, clipped, scrubbed, and clean. Why shouldn't he? Who doesn't want a man with nice/not gross feet? More men should get pedicures. 

Leslie: If he's down, I'm down.

15. Is double-dipping okay?

Emily: If I'm with close friends, I pretty much exclusively double dip. There's nothing sadder than having to deprive yourself - and forcing down that second half of PLAIN CELERY - simply because of germs (as you can tell, I'm completely unfazed by them). 

Geoffrey: We all know the right answer and if you need to ask, you're obviously a double dipper.

Alina: Abhorrent behavior. Control yourself. You're in the company of others. No. Disgusting. I will not qualify this response by letting you know for the 3rd time (at least) on this blog that I am a germaphobe. Irrelevant–thou shalt not double dip unless you're ALONE. 

Leslie: I'm 100% okay with this so I often forget that not everyone else is. I'm trying to get better at asking if it's okay!

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