Cupcakes and Cashmere

Wedding Worries

February 22nd, 2012



{Trying on dresses at Gabriella Bridal Salon back in November}

On February 14th, my fiancé  called me to wish me a Happy Valentine’s Day (I was still in New York at the time) and then said, “I can’t wait to marry you in two months.” It was such a sweet moment, and yet somehow I simply couldn’t get my head around the fact that there were only a few weeks left until our wedding. I’m a notorious worrier – and since we only have a couple things left to finalize (our cake tasting is this afternoon!), I’ve suddenly found myself getting overwhelmed by the whole thing. I’m not a fan of New Year’s Eve, my birthday parties are a constant source of panic, and events that have a lot of hype around them just turn me off. But now that we’re mere weeks away from arguably the biggest day of our lives, I want to embrace it with every ounce of my being.

The best advice I received when we first got engaged came from a dear friend who reminded me that as soon as the planning process became stressful or unenjoyable, to take a step back and regroup. There were certainly times throughout the past year that we considered eloping or just driving down to the courthouse, but in the end, I think we did a good job of truly savoring our engagement. So instead of worrying if my mascara will be waterproof enough, if we’ll have beautiful weather, or what will happen if I completely forget my vows, I’ve finally come around to the idea of letting myself be undeniably thrilled about our wedding.

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  • http://cuterandomthings.blogspot.com/ Hi_D

    Oh you look so lovely…

    Hi_D

    http://cuterandomthings.blogspot.com/

  • http://suzimaynard.blogspot.com Suzi Maynard

    This is an amazingly exciting time for you! I saw a bride having her alterations done at my specialist drycleaners tonight. She looked gorgeous, as I’m sure you wil too. Lovely photo of you by the way!
    Suzi x
    For the Love of Audrey

  • http://justcakegirl.blogspot.com/ Just Cake Girl

    I hope everything goes well!!! Don’t worry to much and enjoy!!! :)

  • Carla

    Dear Emily, I married half a year ago and I totally understand what you’re feeling right now. This is what helped me: whatever happens at your wedding day that won’t be perfect or the way you’ve planned, at the end of the day you will be married to the person you love and that is the most important and most fabulous thing. Also, it is not the cake, the weather or the strawberries in your aperitif that you (and your guests) will remember later. It is the time and atmosphere with all those great people you invited, who came together to celebrate your love. It will all be good – don’t worry! :-)
    Greetings from Germay! Carla

  • Brianne

    When I was getting married so many people told me that things might not go exactly as planned and that may or may not be true for your special day, but, in the end, all that matters is that you are marrying your true love and, on top of that, the people that mean the most to you will be there to witness it! So savor every moment (because it will go by fast) and have an amazing time on your wedding day!

  • http://lesmoineauxdelamariee.blogspot.com Geraldine des Moineaux

    REEM ACRA <3

    Wish you THE best !

  • http://tinybitofsugar.blogspot.com/ chiara

    Dear Emily, thanks for sharing these thoughts with us.
    I can understand you very well as in three months time I will get married, too… xoxo

  • sg

    get over yourself. honestly.

  • http://www.multistyleblog.blogspot.com Rebeca Jacuniak Bucholtz

    Hi!! I’m brazilian and always see your blog! I married two years ago and I know what it’s! Don’t worry… I’m sure you’ll be gorgeous bride and have a perfect day! God bless you in everything and give you peace!
    Congratulations, the wedding day is really unforgettable!

    http://multistyleblog.blogspot.com/

  • http://Notyet Margaux L

    You look so georgous !!!! I wish you all the best !!! Come in TX when you want ! :)

  • Julia

    Hi Emily!
    I just got married three months ago and I pretty much feel the same way as you described about big events. However my wedding day was just the opposite!
    I had a pleasant engagement, with minor setbacks but still got to enjoy the hole process.
    I can tell you that on our wedding day everything seems to find itself in place! It’s almost as magic, but everything works out perfectly.
    You’ll truly look incredibly beautiful because the happiness you’ll fell on that day is so huge that it transcends to you face and everyone that’s celebrating with you just want you to be so happy, that the love you’ll feel is amazing making it one of the most amazing days you’ll ever have!

  • Maria @ Cheeky Pink Tulip

    I think we’re ALL undeniably thrilled! And stress all you want now because it’s 100% true when they say that all your worries will melt away on the day. Mine did! It was the most fun I’ve ever had!

    Maria xx
    http://www.cheekypinktulip.blogspot.com

  • http://www.todaloos.com mikky

    It is always surprising to read that you are a worrier, it is actually nice to know! You seem to have it all together, I`m so impressed that you have made a living blogging. I always invisioned you completely relaxed whipping up all these friends get togethers you post the recipes from and that you have everything perfectly done. So there is hope for me too !!!

    As for your wedding, at mine there were a bunch of mishaps, people didn`t put things in the right places, somethings we paid alot for looked completely different on our wedding day, for a minute in my head I was angry, but immediately I told myself it`s not important just be nice and polite, tell them to get someone to fix the things that I knew could be fixed (ex. all the place cards were mixed up – don`t do it yourself though, cause that will just waste your day) and to not even argue with the people who did things completely wrong (they had messed up the colours of some of our items, really ugly and I had even told them when buying them that I was spending more then I budgetted) because it won`t change anything and it`s not worth putting a damper on your or your grooms day. You can tell yourself that when you get back from your honeymoon you can go see them to straighten things out then. Plus you have this hugely read blog so I doubt they`d want to risk getting a bad review from you if they refuse to compensate you for any mishaps.
    Enjoy every moment of it.
    :)
    mikky
    http://www.todaloos.com

  • http://www.pencilstitches.blogspot.com cathryn

    I 100% know what you mean. I am getting married a few weeks after you in May, and I seem to be having the same fear! I feel the person who puts the most pressure on you, is yourself! Me and the fiance took a step away from planning, and we feel so much more refreshed, less stressed, and we are looking forward to getting back into the thick of finalising everything!!

    Good luck on your big day!! :)

  • Hannah B

    Girl. I am 2 months away from my wedding too, and just the same way. I don’t usually enjoy events centered around me or with a lot of hype…and I am a bit of a control freak so I am trying really hard to not implode knowing that I still have some minor (to me they seem major) details to figure out. I am trying to relax about it, but it’s hard. Everyone said it would be stressful but I had no idea! What really relaxes me is thinking about the honeymoon…2 weeks in Tahiti, alrighty!

  • http://www.alittlelea.com/ Lea

    Always love your blog, but especially love this post! A friend told me, if you don’t consider eloping, then you are doing something wrong! ha Here’s to taking a pause from engagement craziness. ;)

  • http://saracampbellblog.blogspot.com Sara Campbell

    THRILLED, as you should be. What very sound advice that was to step back and regroup (and not just for wedding planning!!). Well, best of luck with the rest of the planning, I hope it is stress-free and enjoyable :)
    Xo,
    Sara Campbell
    ^Follow the link to our blog for all things chic, fabulous, fun, and Sara Campbell!

  • Katie

    The best advice I’ve ever heard about weddings is that it doesn’t matter how smoothly the day goes, as long as you’re married to the one you love at the end of the day.
    PS. I’ve heard rain is a sign of good luck at weddings

  • http://ourworlditsmiles.blogspot.com Ashlee Laielli

    I know EXACTLY how you feel! Despite making every choice in the wedding planning process based on the most easy going mentality one could imagine, I hit my usual panic mode as soon as I put on the dress the day of. We were getting married by the water and planned the cocktail hour and ceremony outside by the beach, on a day a major storm swept the east coast and even the tents could barely keep out the rain. We ended up getting married on the dance floor in front of our band, who transitioned right into our first song post-kiss the bride. Everyone arrived early because of the storm, we were all loosed up with a little champagne, and half the room was crying and cheering as we said I do (and at several other points throughout the ceremony.) It apparently turned out to be the most beautiful, joyful and over-all fun wedding anyone there had ever been to. No one stopped dancing all night, they even forgot to serve the cake and no one noticed! Looking back there were a whole list of mishaps, including major flooding outside the hall, and all anyone remembers was having the time of their lives. I had literally never felt anything even close to that kind of happiness before, something I had totally not anticipated. Your love can hypnotize the whole night if you let it <3

  • Lori

    I just started reading your blog and love coming back for updates and seeing all your cute outfits and meal ideas. For one less worry on your day – instead of using waterproof mascara, get those single false eyelashes glued to each lash – they make your lashes look super thick and pretty (you don’t need any mascara) and hold up really well – no smudging if you have tears! Also look great for the next morning – even without makeup you look done up with them on. And they last 2 weeks so they will look great all through the honeymoon- instead of worrying about putting on makeup in the morning you can just lay in bed and enjoy or get out and have fun- you will even look great while swimming! although I am sure you would anyway:) Good luck with your day!

  • Meredith

    I got married almost 8 years ago. This may make me your oldest reader :) . Your wedding will be a big party, surrounded by people you love and it will be wonderful, thrilling, exhausting, memorable, beautiful. For your sake, I hope it will not be the most important day of your life. There are many more important days to come – the day(s) your children are born, the days you find out one of you lost a loved one. There will be all the menial little days that make a marriage. Moving days, first days on a new job, first days at a new school, first day the baby sleeps thru the night, first day the baby poops in the potty (you have no idea how trilling that one is!). The wedding is only important because it is the first day of all the days that make a marriage.

  • http://ellemode3.blogspot.com Natalia Aguilar

    How exciting, congratulations! How long were you engaged for if you don’t mind me asking?

  • http://overvanillaskies.tumblr.com/ Stephanie

    You will be surrounded by more love in one room, than you’ve ever experienced in your life. All your loved ones ~ PLUS the love of your life…will all be there, by your side. That alone gave me an out-of-body experience when we got married just over a year ago. It’s so surreal ~ you will be floating on cloud 9 the entire day. Any imperfections will turn into quirky, funny, memorable moments. Who wants a “perfect” wedding anyway? :) But it WILL be perfect, in it’s own special way. Congrats!!!

  • Tiff

    You look so pretty on that pic. Yeah the wedding plan gets a bit haywire at times. I love when the various websites send the emails that send you into overdrive. All the best for your fab day! Cheers!!

  • http://palepinkandmusic.blogspot.com/ Iliana

    congratulations on your engagement! And you look really pretty in that pic.

  • http://dormroomsiesta.blogspot.com Marcie

    Congrats! This was a lovely post!

  • http://charcoalandlace.blogspot.com charcoal&lace

    Love your dress and can’t wait to see photos from your big day!!

    http://www.charcoalandlace.blogspot.com

  • http://daretobedomestic.blogspot.com/ Kelly @ Dare to be Domestic

    I’m so excited for you and can’t wait to see your wedding! Your friend was right. The end is always the most stressful. No matter how much you plan ahead, get things organized it’s always a mad dash at the end. I am a notorious procrastinator, and for my wedding I didn’t want to be that way so I organized and prioritized my little heart out. 2 weeks before the wedding I made the elope statement and then realized I was just stressed. In the end what truly matters isn’t if the centerpieces are perfect… because lets face it only you know the true vision you have, everyone will think it’s beautiful regardless. It’s that you are making a vow to love your one and only for the rest of your lives, sweet, simple and perfect. If you keep in mind the day is about that and not the proper shade of a certain color, you’ll enjoy it 100%.

    *I’m a bit mushy today I just watched our wedding video for the first time so I’m all warm and fuzzy. We got married in October.

  • Karissa

    You look beautiful. Will you share some pics after the event? The dress in the pic is incredible. Curious to know if that’s the one you bought.

    Love this blog!

  • http://www.prairiegirlinthecity.com Prairie Girl in the City

    I got married this last October. The best advice I got was….don’t get overwhelmed, and enjoy every moment because it goes by fast. You will be the most beautiful bride. Enjoy!

    Jen
    http://www.prairiegirlinthecity.com

  • http://lookseebynaomifenton.blogspot.com/ eat my shorts

    Good luck! I’m sure it will be fabulous! :)

  • alina

    I’m getting married in two months too!! (end of April) and am feeling beyond overwhelmed & nervous, neurotic, etc.etc.etc.

    but this is what we both have to think: http://pinterest.com/pin/120893571217103904/

    It’s true!

    congrats on what will be an AMAZING wedding day ;)

  • http://trystnshout.blogspot.com Britta

    As a fellow bride-to-be (planning a destination wedding in Oxford, England), I totally relate! Also, loved the photo you posted, and I hope you don’t mind but I used it as inspiration for an illustration: http://trystnshout.blogspot.com/2012/02/vector-sketch-bridal.html

    Happy Wedding-ing!
    xoxo
    Britta

  • http://thecanarydiaries.blogspot.com Regan

    Wonderful advice! You will be a stunning bride. Best wishes!

  • http://roseanneatthecarrefour.blogspot.com/ Roseanne

    awww im so happy for you!dont be nervous!enjoy it!x

  • http://ilookgoodtoday.com Jamie

    That is wonderful advice. I’ve been married going on six years and like you, towards the end of our engagement I began to feel the pressures of it all. My mother kept reminding me that everything would be wonderful and on the day of to just take in every single moment and not worry about perfection because in the end, the most perfect thing is you marrying the love of your life!

    XOXO,
    Jamie
    http://ilookgoodtoday.com

  • http://www.evabstyle.blogspot.com Eva

    Oh girl, bask in the glow of being a bride! You will be gorgeous and glowy and knowing your taste its going to be unbelievable. I loved being a bride and all the fun that went along with it. Where are you going for your honeymoon? i bet your dress is STUNNING!!!!
    Xo,
    Eva

    http://www.evabstyle.blogspot.com

  • http://theselipsaremadeforglossing.com Lisa

    What lovely words. Best wishes.

  • http://www.busyworkingmama.com BusyWorkingMama

    Step back and don’t worry! It is only one day in your long life.

  • http://www.accordingtonoes.com Naomi

    You will look amazing whatever you decide, you always have great style :)

  • http://chocolust.tumblr.com Myra

    You look gorgeous :) I love the unique details, on both veil and dress! As usual, you have impeccable taste :P

  • http://www.zweiteiler.blogspot.com zweiteiler

    you look so pretty! You´ll be a beautiful bride! an amazing dress!

    crystal

  • http://www.lotsixtyfive.com Rebecca

    Is that the beautiful Reem Acra I’ve been dying over for ages? I don’t know if that’s your final choice but if it is, you will look incredible (although I’m sure you will no matter your dress choice!)

  • http://www.living-thesuite-life.blogspot.com Shawna Walker

    I am so excited for you and you look stunning. You will be a beautiful and fashionable bride!

    http://www.living-thesuite-life.blogspot.com

  • http://thethingswewouldblog.blogspot.com Jenny

    I love the blog! Best of luck with all of your last minute wedding planning and don’t forget to enjoy these last few months of being engaged! I blog wedding advice on Wednesdays:
    http://thethingswewouldblog.blogspot.com/search/label/Wedding%20Wednesday

  • http://lifeasmodernwife.com Cheryl

    Congrats on finding that perfect mental place of “I just can’t wait to get married” Having gone through these feelings 6 months ago I can completely sympathize. I started a series called Wedding Reflections to offer brides the benefit of hindsight from someone who had a few hiccups along the way. Just posted a piece on making my feather fascinator from my mom’s wedding gown :) http://lifeasmodernwife.com/2012/03/01/something-old-something-new/

  • Elana Berlin

    I wore that exact wedding gown!!!

  • http://www.ampmstyle.com AM PM Style

    It’s the perfet wedding dress for you! Congrats!

    I just featured some short wedding dresses on my blog for less formal ceremonies:
    http://www.ampmstyle.com/blog/2012/3/4/short-wedding-dress-nyc-way.html

  • http://stylehymns.blogspot.com/ N A S T Y A

    AWESOME!!!!

    -N A S T Y A K O N O
    http://stylehymns.blogspot.com/

  • http://www.magz725.blogspot.com Maggie

    aww <3 =] Happy engagement love!! =] Good Luck.